funny scene

‘Rainy’ – a tentative Chapter One

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Ted Wilder walked down the corridor of his high school, taking in all the changes that had been made in the last ten years. The building was nearly empty now, a few stragglers remained near the lockers lining the walls. Some walked by him, talking and laughing, not really paying any attention to him.
A part of him was relieved. He had craved attention once. Been obsessed with it.
But the last two years had helped rid him of his fondness for the spotlight.
Almost. He had to admit he was a little offended at not being recognized. Then again, he’d met the team he was going to coach yesterday and they had certainly known who he was.
He exhaled in a huff and laughed softly to himself. Arrogant bastard.
The principal’s office was around the corner and he sped up knowing that he was late for his appointment.
He knocked on the door and waited for Principal Rain to ask him to come in. A few minutes ticked by. He tried the knob and found the door open.
He entered to find an empty office. He looked around for the new principal. The office looked exactly as it had ten years ago- small and crowded. Filing cabinets and trophy showcases lined the walls. The large desk was piled with papers, though arranged in neat rows. He looked over the tower of papers, wondering if the new Principal might be small enough to hide behind them. Nope, the chair was empty.
“Hello.”
Ted whirled around (more…)

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From Austenland (a surprising funny in the only enjoyable bit)

“What are you doing?”
“Ya!” said Jane, whirling around, her hands held up menacingly.
It was Mr. Nobley with coat, hat, and cane, watching her with wide eyes. Jane took several quick (but oh so casual) steps away from Martin’s window.
“Um, did I just say, ‘Ya’?”
“You just said ‘Ya,'” he confirmed. “If I am not mistaken, it was a battle cry, warning that you were about to attack me.”
“I, uh…” She stopped to laugh. “I wasn’t aware until this precise and awkward moment that when startled in a strange place, my instincts would have me pretend to be a ninja.”

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I dislike this book. Honestly, I do. But this one part here had me in hoops for days. I kept remembering the “Ya!” and laughing at inappropriate moments.

I don’t say that the book didn’t have other slightly redeemable moments, but this was really the only bit that didn’t seem forced. It was perfect. The rest was…trying too hard. I’m not sure how much of an Austen fan Ms Hale is or how deep her research into the regency era went but the number of things she got wrong even in this ‘pretend’ world of Austen is just…ooh, it made my blood boil.

Also, why do contemporary romance heroines like this Jane (or even Bridget Jones for that matter) sound so damned needy and whiny while their respective Darcys watch them somberly, apparently not blind to their idiocies, but falling in love with them anyway?

If you haven’t read the book and don’t know what I’m talking about, click this —> 😦

Here is a page full of other snippets from this book—> Heh, heh.

From Bayou Moon – (a well-written funny)

He’d spent the night in the boat. Next to the spaghetti queen.

William glanced at the hobo girl. She sat across from him, huddled in a clump. Her stench had gotten worse overnight, probably from the dampness. Another night like the last one, and he might snap and dunk her into that river just to clear the air.

She saw him looking. Dark eyes regarded him with slight scorn.

William leaned forward and pointed at the river. “I don’t know why you rolled in spaghetti sauce,” he said in a confidential voice. “I don’t really care. But that water over there won’t hurt you. Try washing it off.”

She stuck her tongue out.

“Maybe after you’re clean,” he said.

Her eyes widened. She stared at him for a long moment. A little crazy spark lit up in her dark irises. She raised her finger, licked it, and rubbed some dirt off her forehead.

Now what?

The girl showed him her stained finger and reached toward him slowly, aiming for his face.

“No,” William said. “Bad hobo.”

The finger kept coming closer.

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Now what cracked me up here – and you, I’m guessing – is the well placed “Bad hobo”. I had never thought that word funny before but it worked here.

For more conversational snippets from this book click —> ME!